The Child is afraid to sleep alone
After three years, if not sooner, toddler strives for independence and actively seeks from her parents.
But here’s the problem: the child is afraid to sleep alone most nights running across from his cozy crib to a parental bed. He is more comfortable here, with relatives.
Of course, all parents love and adore their kids, but mom and dad also need personal space that most recently so demanded the younger sibling for himself.
Children’s fears – this is a natural process of growing up . and even we (think) was afraid of the dark and empty rooms. But our parents managed to cope with our fears. Let’s help her daze.
Mom-no new posts, Nonna asks other experienced moms: “Son is 9 years old. He became afraid to sleep alone. Even afraid to walk around the apartment when it’s dark, even in the bathroom at night afraid to go. He night have bad dreams, shaking all over, jumps out of bed, screaming. Tell me what to do. Maybe I should seek medical attention? “.
Causes of night terrors
Fears appear for many reasons, ranging from overstimulation and ending with the desire for closeness to his beloved mother. Sometimes, the basis of the child’s fear is banal moodiness, which has become a habit.
But most often the main reason why the child is afraid to sleep alone, is the fear of something new . He got used to his way of life, when every evening used to fall asleep in the gentle embrace of a mother, and now your kid can not understand why he has to sleep alone in another room! As before, only with his parents he feels safe . so trying to stretch these moments for a longer period.
Another important and common cause – colorful children’s imagination . which is easy from the shadows in the room can make scary monsters, and the whisper of the wind – in howling ghosts or attack of the Martians. And the more violent fantasy, the stronger night terrors. It is therefore quite understandable desire to cuddle up to someone who can protect from the terrible alien.
Increased activity at bedtime and, as a consequence, excitement can also lead to night terrors. Because excessive activity will lead to difficulties with sleep and a restless night with nightmares.
Daria Selivanova, child psychologist: «fear – this is normal. Abnormal fear become only when it doesn’t go more than 2-3 months and will only get worse, causing significant discomfort to you and the child. If your child is afraid of the dark, but perfectly sleeps with a night light, then this fear will recede. If he is not just afraid of the dark, but refuses to sleep in his room, and then – is afraid to go out in a dark hallway or bathroom, then you should understand the reasons for this fear. If you cannot do it yourself, contact a child psychologist”.
How to help your child cope with night terrors
1. Understand that the child is not to blame for the fact that he didn’t want to sleep alone. At the time you allowed him to sleep with their parents (even if occasionally) – and it cannot wean itself from such an order of things. Firmly, but gently explain to your child that he has grown up and has to sleep alone.
So not all parents believe, for example, mom Ira with our forum she wants the daughter slept with her: “Our baby sleeps with us. The first reason is nowhere to put a bed, and design with the second floor is considered dangerous for her. I like spat with my daughters, and any discomfort I do not test. I miss her all day, and before bedtime at least natseluetes with her, inhale her scent. Besides, at night to hide. I myself, by the way, slept with my grandmother to 7 years, and no deviations not notice ” .
2. Praise your child for obedience . No need to focus attention on those occasions when he disobeyed, do not scold him, and gently explain. Buy for good behavior with sweets or take to the water Park.
3. Put baby to bed at the same time . If it will be easier, do not turn off the light for a while.
4. With your child roll out and cover his crib .
5. Child – host your own room and his own bed . Develop his sense of ownership and autonomy that he wanted to return to his “Kingdom” every night.
6. Grandparents should support you in striving to teach a child to sleep alone. The inconsistency of family members will only complicate the problem.
7. You can buy offspring pajamas featuring his favorite cartoon characters . Explain to him that now the dream “alone” not afraid of him, because with him – his favorite characters. These “friends” can settle on the walls of the nursery, on posters, on the linen of the child. A wonderful option – soft toy that he can sleep through the night.
To help the child to cope with the problem of nocturnal sleep in his room, often hug him, kiss him, make raznoobrazneyshaya leisure. Perhaps the child is simply not enough for your attention and warmth, and he shows it, coming at night to the parental bed.
Talk to the child, because he is an adult now. Try to figure out the true cause of his fears, it is very important to find the cause of the problem, not solve it.
Sweet dreams to you and your child, and let the monsters are afraid to come at night to such a brave family!